If there’s one thing women have got well and truly sussed, it’s friendship. We’re pretty darn fabulous at building sisterhoods, at keeping our friends close, and at being there for each other when it truly matters. We nourish our daughters and our sisters, and we welcome other women into our lives and our confidence until they become part of our family too. A rising tide lifts all boats, as they say, and women innately understand how to join hands to ensure no one is left behind.
I’m fortunate enough to have several forever friends in my own life. As children we shared bubblegum, toys and backyards. As teenagers we swapped secrets, boyfriends and danced in each other’s shoes. And now, as grown women, we remain each other’s loudest cheerleaders, staunchest shoulders to lean on and wisest counsel in times of trouble. Our life choices as adults have sometimes scattered us wide, but our deep, tangled roots mean we can always find our way back to each other.
It’s true to say that these ladies have been a huge influence on my books; my own experience of friendship inevitably informs all of the friendships that make it onto the page, never more so than with Laurie and Sarah in One Day in December. I knew from the outset that I wanted them to share a once in a lifetime kind of friendship; they’re two very different women but they have enough in common to bond them as close as sisters.
One Day in December spans a decade of their lives, and in many ways, Laurie’s relationship with Sarah is the most important in the book. It’s certainly the most enduring.
Strong female friendship is a much-visited theme across the board in fiction, from familiar favorites like Anne of Green Gables and Little Women, to more contemporary hits like Balli Kaur Jaswal’s big -hearted Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows (which was also a Reese’s Book Club pick!) and Liane Moriarty’s enthralling Big Little Lies. I was totally addicted—on one hand a gripping thriller with a dark secret, on the other a testimony to female friendship. It really showcases women coming together, supporting each other, and ultimately being ready to stand up for each other when it really matters.
Female friendship has provided us with some of the richest on-screen relationships, too. The fabulous Steel Magnolias, anyone? Sticking with the inimitable Dolly Parton, I’ll throw 9 to 5 into the mix. It’s hilarious, of course, but I especially love how it portrays the collective strength of women when they unite against a common enemy. In contrast, I’m a tearful mess every time I watch Beaches, based on the novel of the same name by Iris Rainer Dart. The lifelong relationship between CC & Hillary is so tenderly drawn and emotional, a rollercoaster of highs and lows, and although it culminates in tragedy, there’s beauty too, as one takes on the other’s daughter as her own.
I’m convinced we recognize bits of ourselves and all of the brilliant women we love every time we read one more chapter late into the night or sit in darkened auditoriums with tears sliding down our cheeks. Our friendships live between the most powerful lines of the stories, and we see them mirrored in all of the most devastating or triumphant scenes of the movies. Our friends are our yesterdays, and we know they’ll be there on all of our pages as yet unwritten.
In recent years, bromance has become a much over-used word. There isn’t really an equivalent word for female friendship, but I think that’s probably because there’s no need for one. Perhaps men are only just discovering the power of deep friendship, but women have understood it for centuries.