July 6, 2021

The Notion of Choice

Miranda Cowley Heller, author of our July Pick: The Paper Palace, on choices, agency, having it all and deciding which all

The Notion of Choice

Miranda Cowley Heller, author of our July Pick: The Paper Palace, on choices, agency, having it all and deciding which all

When I was young and having an impossible time trying to decide between two things, my mother would always say: “Flip a coin. If you are disappointed by the outcome, do the opposite.” Your gut knows the answer even if you don’t, is what she was trying to say. My first job out of college was working at Cosmopolitan for Helen Gurley Brown, a magazine founded on the (then radical!) notion of female empowerment, of “Having it All.” Women, it told us, don’t have to choose or sacrifice; they can “have it all.” It’s a great mantra and an important battle cry. But here’s the thing: everyone, whoever you are, whatever age, whatever gender, has to make hard choices. And it is precisely those choices that define who we become. You can have it all, but you still have to choose which “all.”

“We’ve all been faced with these moments—choosing between one kind of happiness and another.”

When I started writing The Paper Palace, I was facing a very difficult crossroads in my personal life. I knew I had to move forward, but I felt frozen in place . . . because I wanted to be in two places at once. Flip a coin. Flip it again. Flip it again. The problem with my mother’s advice was that, as the saying goes, there are indeed two sides to every coin. So, what do you do when there’s no clear right answer, and yet your life depends on it? What if both sides of the coin are “heads”? “For me, Elle’s dilemma distills down to simple but universal questions: Who do I want to be? What parts of myself do I want to be true to in the end? Which choice will bring me closer to that goal?”

“Who do I want to be? What parts of myself do I want to be true to in the end? Which choice will bring me closer to that goal?”

It was the impossibility of that kind of choice that I wanted to explore in The Paper Palace. At the center of this story is Elle Bishop, a woman who has to make an impossible and life-changing decision in a single summer day at the run-down camp on Cape Cod, where she has spent every summer of her life. Twenty-four hours in Elle’s life in which she has to choose between the life she has made with her very excellent and genuinely beloved husband, Peter, and the life she has always imagined she wanted with her best friend and childhood love, Jonas. The choice Elle has to make is a choice between two completely different but equally powerful loves. We’ve all been faced with these moments—choosing between one kind of happiness and another. In this case, Elle must choose between a great love and a great love. There is no bad choice here . . . which also means there is no good choice. For me, Elle’s dilemma distills down to simple but universal questions: Who do I want to be? What parts of myself do I want to be true to in the end? Which choice will bring me closer to that goal?

Interestingly, though I didn’t realize it at the time, writing The Paper Palace became my choice. I came to an impossible crossroads and, instead of going left or right, I struck out across the muddy fields.

Tag your book bestie who gets it 😂.
A gentle reminder to make time for you — whether that means making yourself lunch or finally diving into that book you’ve been wanting to read, from the lovely @BrieLarson 💛

On this week's episode of Bookmarked, the Reese's Book Club podcast, co-authors of @PartyPeople @BrieLarson & @Courtney_McBroom join host @DanielleRobay to chat about how food can do more than just bring us together. 

Start listening on the @iHeartPodcast app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you love to listen.
Our City Chapter Bookbassadors are celebrating one month on WhatsApp! Say hello to Brielle from the Charleston chapter, Kaylah from the Nashville Chapter, Haley from the St. Louis chapter, Liz from the New York chapter + Samantha from the Los Angeles chapter! 

These women are leading the conversation, sharing book recs, and making bookish friends IRL in our new local WhatsApp groups. Have you joined in your area yet? It’s not just for the city girlies- you can join even if you live in the area! 👀📍
We may party hard, but we'll always read harder!

On this week's episode of Bookmarked, the Reese's Book Club podcast, the incredible @BrieLarson & @Courtney_McBroom join host @DanielleRobay to chat all things @PartyPeople. It's not just a cookbook — it's a reason to celebrate every occasion.

Listen now on @iHeartPodcast, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you love to listen! And don't forget to pick up a copy of Party People at our link in bio.
New guest alert! 🚨 Find out who’s joining @daniellerobay this week on a new episode of Bookmarked, the Reese's Book Club podcast. Tune in tomorrow for a thrilling conversation you won’t want to miss!

Press play on the @iHeartPodcast app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you love to listen.
Time for a rewatch and reread 📺 We can’t wait for Season 2 of The Last Thing He Told Me! What’s a book-to-screen adaptation you’re still not over?
Which fictional book character made you believe in love again? (Or made it impossible for anyone to measure up? 🫣)
Starting off this weekend strong with our November pick Wild Dark Shore and coffee! ☕📙

What are you reading this weekend?
If you could step into the world of any book, which would you choose? We’ll go first: we’re currently getting lost in the breathtaking world of Wild Dark Shore by @charlottemcconaghy.